I had a profound epiphany over the last 24 hours that I feel compelled to share. It all started while listening to a few podcasts by Peter Crone (highly recommended, especially this one, HEAL with Kellie), where he spoke about a powerful truth: we suffer most when we resist reality. And it hit me—I’ve been resisting what’s happening in my personal life, especially with family dynamics, and it’s been weighing me down.
When we resist what is, we create unnecessary suffering.
For me, it manifests as a pit in my stomach, a tightening that comes from wanting things to be different than they are. I get upset, frustrated, even angry. But the truth is, no matter how much I resist or wish it were otherwise, reality is reality. And…
The more I resist it, the more I suffer.
Life, I believe, is always giving us exactly what we need for our growth. There’s a deep wisdom in that, and I know it to be true. But sometimes, we forget, don’t we? We get wrapped up in our ideas of how things should be, how others should act, and what the outcome should look like. It’s in this gap between what is and what we think should be that we create our own suffering.
The moment we stop resisting and instead surrender to what is actually happening, something shifts. That pit in the stomach dissolves, and a sense of calm takes its place. In that calmness, we open ourselves up to new insights and fresh wisdom that simply can’t come when we’re locked in resistance.
When we're stuck in that resistant state, we’re caught in a loop, closed off from possibility. It’s a form of being “below the line”—a victim mindset where life is happening to us. We think things like, “My mom is being mean to me,” or “This situation is unfair,” and while those feelings might seem justified, they don’t get us anywhere. In fact, they keep us trapped.
Personal example: Just last night, I woke up in the middle of the night worried about a difficult family dynamic, and the realization hit me again: I’ve been resisting what’s actually happening. And it’s in this resistance that I’ve been keeping myself stuck. The key is in surrendering to the present moment—acknowledging that this is what’s happening right now.
Being out in nature helps me remember this truth. Surrounded by the simplicity and beauty of the natural world, I can breathe more deeply. My mind clears, and I am reminded that
in this very moment, nothing is wrong.
I’m safe. My needs are met. I have food, shelter, and everything I need.
These moments of stillness remind me that life is unfolding exactly as it should, even if it doesn’t always match my expectations.
So, here’s what I’m learning: When we let go of the fight, when we stop resisting what is, we create space for something new. We allow wisdom to come in from a place of peace, not struggle. It’s a practice I’m deepening, and I’ll be sharing more about it in the coming months as this journey continues to unfold.
For now, I’m leaning into surrender, trusting that the path forward will reveal itself—not through force, but through allowing.
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